BB FANS

Breast, singular! Bums plural...

I dare you to say breasts plural. Go on, say it

Sorry about last week's not getting done.

This week!

Suggesting the reason he's always been "jittery" with money is because it changed to the decimal system only three weeks before he was born so while he was in his mum's tummy the whole build up had been going on Anyway, the suggestion that £1 fare should be taken from taxi drivers picking up from the Aberdeen airport not impressing him much but they have decided that it isn't going to happen. The reason they were suggesting it was to cover costs for enhanced security but he didn't feel that this should be taken from the taxi drivers and instead from a "national purse".

Daniel Radcliffe buying a second appartment in NYC, this one costing a cool $4.9 million. He's renting out the other and living in this one while he stars in Equus on Broadway.

Suzanne Shaw getting named Celebrity Mum of the Year, he mentions getting home for Mothers day and how Suzanne has only had a son for three years so she should wait til she's had one for as long as his.

Sending off a letter to BA to find out when he'll get his air taxes repaid and how some people will be due substantial amounts as it is over three years.

Moreen Simpson celebrating her 60th birthday and how it is also the 60th anniversay for Land Rover this year.

Thank you CameronBB4


People say it often enough, but do you think that ignorance really is bliss? I know very little about the judicial system in this country, thank goodness. Most people will be in the same boat as me on that particular issue. But when I learn snippets here and there, sometimes I get a bit riled.
I listened with intrigue to Radio Scotland the other day when there was a news piece about a man who has set up some unusual deterrents for vandals who continually damage his property.
One piece of equipment sounded like a cross between an ejector seat and a human catapult, into which this gentleman, the victim of persistent badgering and vandalism, intends to load chicken droppings soaked with water. If one of the trespassers inadvertently pulls on a trip wire, the catapult is set to deposit the murky mixture all over them. The other mediaeval-sounding property- protector was the hybrid of a battering ram and a human cannon; a large piece of wood which would be propelled towards the offender in a bid to scare them off the property.
Having faced umpteen instances of vandalism and with no other deterrents having any effect, you can hardly blame the poor chap for resorting to unusual methods of warding off criminals. But he’s been told by the police that these constitute booby traps, and are therefore illegal! Clearly, any criminal would have more than egg on their face if they encountered the airborne chicken dirt, and the long arm of the law must do all in its power to avoid humiliating any law-breakers. I know it’s ill-advised to take the law into your own hands, but perish the thought that the poor victim’s frustration should cause any embarrassment to the perpetrator of the crime.
On top of this nonsense, I discover that foreign criminals are being offered £3000 to get out of the country! And apparently, their normal “financial reintegration package” amounts to a paltry £800. No wonder Home Office figures report that deportation figures were up by 80% last year.
Chief Executive of the Border and Immigration Agency Lin Homer is quoted as saying “We strongly believe that foreign lawbreakers should be sent home at the earliest opportunity.” By deporting these criminals, the Agency claims to save taxpayers over £100 per criminal, per night.
At the same time we hear that the Coastguard Service has gone on strike, with the union demanding a £3000 pay rise for members of our fourth emergency service. I know where I’d rather my tax went.




I’ve never been much of an internet shopper. I’ve bought some items I suppose, but I am not a regular on the auction sites at all. However, I read a story this week about a guy who intends to get himself a house, not by buying it, but by SWAPPING his way into property! Via the internet, this Canadian chap started out with a red paper clip and exchanged it first for a pen, then for a door handle and worked his way up to a snowmobile. After a year of it he’s managed to trade up to a year’s free accommodation in Arizona. Wonder if he’ll make it!


I see the interest rate for how they calculate winnings on the Premium Bonds has dropped from 3.8% to 3.6%. As a long-time bond holder I don’t think it’s a very good move. Even if you don’t hold any bonds, somebody in your family might have in the past – over £30 million remains unclaimed. Check it out, just in case!


Today is apparently the International day of Awesomeness. I know it’s a daft title, and more than likely has just been made up by some crackpot on a computer. Alexander Graham Bell made the first ever telephone call on this day in 1876, and the first film made in Hollywood was released in 1910. Those were pretty awesome events.


I’m a big fan of fast car movies like “Gone in 60 Seconds” for the sheer escapism of it all – and especially the thrill of the chase. Next in the pipeline is “Fast and Furious 4” which will star the lovely ‘Lost’ actress Michelle Rodriguez, alongside Vin Diesel, Paul Walker and Jordana Brewster. All the more reason to watch it!

Main bit is about money seen as the budget is soon to be announced. Mentions various things going up and mentions inheritance tax and how it really gets to him that when people die their money that they were taxed on when they earnt it and then there was interest tax on it in the bank... gets taxed again before given to their relatives. Really objecting to taxes going to MPs for items for their homes etc rather than sorting out roads/health/whatever.

Michael Jackson nearly losing his Neverland property after falling £12.5 million into arrears.

Remembering being a kid and getting new shoes so seeing how fast you could run in them. Using the same philosophy in buying a new pair of boots for hill-walking and it is having the right effect.

New reality TV show which is about Paris Hilton finding a new best friend from 20 competitors. (sorry but - for goodness sake)

A study in Dundee finding that kids who got to play on Nintendo Brain Training helped improve their behaviour - soon moving to the NE.

Thank you Jezi - I know you're busy.

Sooo shattered but nae home again to Weds or Thurs so thought I'd better get this done tonight! Gonna have to be short and sweet.

The main bit really carries on from the piece about the budget last week and how Scotland Yard has now said about the "chaotic state of Commons expenses" - mentions the money going on stuff that isn't even related to the jobs there etc.

A survey about the worst person for leader - Gordon Brown was selected as 4th worst with 11% yet Posh and Becks only had 6%.

A Barbie doll being made of Suzanne Shaw and how she admitted she'd not heard of the American presidential candidates.

Usually having to issues with sleep but having a weird dream about shopping and the shopkeeper insisting he put in 2 bottles of whisky and a packet of highligters!

An old joke that whenever Orcadians went to Aberdeen they'd buy knickers from M&S, turns out they were quite right as they have been shown to be the best.

The Orcadians, or the knickers?

hahahaha - good point gg

Thanks muppet!

The furore surrounding MPs’ expenses has increased once again. In the wake of complaints about how our taxes are being spent, and calls for MPs to be more transparent in their job-related spending and expenses claims, the House of Commons Speaker had to ban the topic as our own Alex Salmond came under fire. First Minister and Banff & Buchan MP Mr. Salmond was criticized for the level of expenses he’s claimed from parliament over the past year – amounting to almost six times the national average wage.
I don’t suppose that Mr. Salmond has been bathing in asses’ milk or lying on velvet cushions being fed nectarines by fan-waving nymphs. From what I’ve encountered of him, he appears to be hard-working and conscientious North-Easterner. He himself has made the figures public and I don’t think it’s a double bluff in order to pull the wool over our eyes. In fact Mr. Salmond has called for MPs to take a leaf out of the Scottish Parliament’s book and suggests that they all publish their figures every quarter.
The vast bulk of the first minister’s £130,000 expenses went on staff costs – almost £85,000 in fact. It does appear to be a huge figure and it might be wise to account for it. We wouldn’t like to unearth a situation similar to that of disgraced ex-Tory Whip, MP Derek Conway who was recently ordered to repay the sum of £13,000 which had been paid to his son Freddie for supposedly acting as a researcher. Transparency is the key – if you have nothing to hide, don’t hide anything!
I am very surprised that the travel expenses for such an important minister are so minimal. Claims of under £1500 for himself and just over £2000 for his staff are accounted for, along with £300 for his wife. The cost of renting a flat amounts to almost fourteen thousand pounds however, and criticisms have been levelled that he’d have been cheaper staying at the Ritz Hotel, based on the number of overnights he’s had in London. Incidental expenses are harder to account for sometimes, and amount to over £18,000. It might be helpful if these were detailed.
Other expenses incurred in the line of duty included £2200 for communications, £1250 for computing, £1000 for stationery and nearly £5000 on postage costs. I think he’ll better head out today and get a load of stamps before they go up in price tomorrow.


Fair fares.
Always one for a bargain, I’m delighted about BA’s announcement that they’re introducing a budget once-a-day flight between Aberdeen and Orkney. The flight promises to cost as little as £22 one-way, and is guaranteed never to be over £100 return. If you can’t get a seat at that fare, the other good news is that The European Commission has given its approval for the Scottish Government to continue the Air Discount Scheme for another three years starting tomorrow. The scheme offers 40% discount on the core airfare on certain routes at certain times. And is a definite boon for somebody like me who travels on these flights so frequently.


If like me you use a lot of stamps, get out and stock up on them today. The Post Office is raising the price of both first and second class stamps from tomorrow’s date, but of course stamps bought before the rise will be honoured. First class is up 2p to 36p and second goes up from 24p to 27p.



Anybody who was a teenager in the eighties will most likely remember blonde-tipped Kim Wilde’s No.1 hit “You Keep Me Hanging On” which topped the American charts in 1987. It’s amazing to think that no British female artist has hit number one over the pond since then, until Leona Lewis last week with “Bleeding Love”. Good for her, I reckon.



One of the World’s most successful music artistes thinks she wouldn’t have made the big time if programmes like Pop Idol had been around in the 80s. Global superstar Madonna admitted she was frequently cut from auditions for musical theatre in the early stages and had doors slammed in her face by unimpressed record companies. I’m really glad she stuck at it!

Be afraid, be very afraid! With Ryanair to Aberdeen, and now this 'be nice to the natives' reasonably-priced fare on to Orkney, you could get all sorts of weirdos turning up there in future.

Mind you, I don't suppose they're too keen on people taking Camper Vans as luggage.

Fashion has never been my strong point, but thanks to Jessie, Iris and Val in Debenhams at The Mall, my overall appearance has improved dramatically over the past few years. Some may disagree, granted, but I hate to think what I might leave the house in if it hadn’t been for their help!
I’m pretty careful with money usually, and I’m never too extravagant when it comes to spending on myself but I do know that sometimes it’s more cost-effective to spend a bit more on something that’ll last. But when I saw hoodies which are launching later this month with a price tag of £300, I was intrigued. These are not just any old hoodies though – these are bulletproof hoodies, able to protect their wearer from shots out of a 9mm Magnum handgun! The London-based manufacturer of these garments says that demand from concerned parents has been one of the main catalysts for production of these items, along with interest from America where gun crime is substantially more rife than it is here.
This comes on the back of the government’s announcement that a quarter of all ten year olds have never played outside without being supervised by an adult, and that a third of parents wouldn’t allow children ages between eight and 17 to play outside their immediate home property. Part of the ‘cotton-wool culture’ stems from young people’s interest in the internet and online gaming, and the fact that nearly two hundred school and community playing fields have been sold off in the last ten years. Childhood obesity is a growing concern, highlighted just last week in the case of a Dundee family whose children risk being taken into care if they don’t make huge improvements in their food and feeding habits.
But we haven’t always been plagued with such worries. Hoodies aren’t even a new thing. I remember in Primary 5 wearing mine just by the hood and a tribe of us tearing down the street seeing whose would fleeter out the back just like a real superhero. I suppose we weren’t complete saints when it came to sweeties and fizzy juice either, but at least we were outside playing and burning it off. And if we needed a drink, we could even take a sloke out of somebody’s house tap, or even garden hose without it killing us! I think it’s time we were a bit less paranoid.



When it comes to grey matter, we lads think we have it sussed. And scientists in New Mexico have proved it, particularly when it comes to navigating unfamiliar territory without stopping to ask for directions! Grey matter is the part of the brain used for information processing, visual skills and spatial awareness (in other words ‘parking’). The lesser-known ‘white matter’ is key in areas such as language skills and multi-tasking (i.e. asking for directions). The study showed that men use over six times the amount of grey matter that women do, whilst women tend to make better use of their white matter. Whoever said things were black and white!


It’s just three weeks till Madonna’s new album ‘Hard Candy’ is released. But it’s not the only candy the raunchy rebel has been working on. Appropriately enough for the time of year, Madonna has revealed that one of the best things about living in Britain is Creme Eggs. Can’t say I disagree – I wonder if she’s tried them deep fried.


The question mark over Donald Trump’s glorious golf course seems to have been elevated in stature once again. The plan featuring two courses, five hundred dwelling houses and a 450-bedroom hotel has been on shaky foundations, not helped by Mr. Trump’s recent gaffe over the importance of the local SSSI. He should do his homework, or let somebody else do the talking.



With all the council cuts and closures going on, I’m scunnered I can’t get to the Evening Express-hosted meeting at the King’s College this Thursday. The four party leaders - Kate Dean from the Lib Dems, Kevin Stewart from the SNP, Len Ironside from Labour and Alan Milne from the Conservatives have agreed to take questions. See website for more details.