BB FANS

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she
laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and
listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his
head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your Duck, Cuddles, has passed
away."

The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I'm quite sure. The
duck is dead," he replied. How can you be so sure," she protested. "I
mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just
be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes ( ) turned around and left the room and
returned a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever.

As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind
legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck
from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook
his head.

The vet patted the dog and took it out, and returned a few moments
later with a cat. The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed
delicately at the bird. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its
head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this
is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."

Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and
produced a bill which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still
in shock, looked at the bill. "£150!", she cried.. £150 just to tell me
my duck is dead?"

The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry." "If you'd taken my word for it, the
bill would have been £20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan
It's now £150."