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Two Irishmen were sitting at a pub having beer and watching the brothel across the street. They saw a Baptist minister walk into the brothel, and one of them said, 'Aye, 'tis a shame to see a man of the cloth goin' bad.'
Then they saw a rabbi enter the brothel, and the other Irishman said, 'Aye, 'tis a shame to see that the Jews are fallin' victim to temptation as well.' Then they see a catholic priest enter the brothel, and one of the Irishmen said, 'What a terrible pity...one of the girls must be dying. ************************************* Irish Cemetery Three Irishmen, Paddy, Sean and Seamus, were stumbling home from the pub late one night and found themselves on the road which led past the old graveyard.. 'Come have a look over here,' says Paddy, 'It's Michael O'Grady's grave, God bless his soul. He lived to the ripe old age of 97.' 'That's nothing,' says Sean, 'here's one named Patrick O'Toole, it says here that he was 95 when he died.'! Just then, Seamus yells out, 'Good God, here's a fella that got to be 145!' 'What was his name?' asks Paddy. Seamus stumbles around a bit, awkwardly lights a match to see what else is written on the stone marker, and exclaims, 'Miles, from Dublin.' ***************************************************
Irish Predicament
Drunk Ole Mulvihill (From the Northern Irish Clan) staggers into a Catholic Church, enters a confessional box, sits down, but says nothing. The Priest coughs a few times to get his attention but Ole Mulvihill just sits there.
Finally, the Priest pounds three times on the wall. The drunk mumbles, 'ain't no use knocking, there's no paper on this side either.' *************************************************** Irish Last Request Mary Clancy goes up to Father O'Grady's after his Sunday morning service, and she's in tears. He says, 'So what's bothering you, Mary my dear?' She says, 'Oh, Father, I've got terrible news. My husband passed away last night.' The priest says, 'Oh, Mary, that's terrible. Tell me, did he have any last requests?'
She says, 'That he did, Father...'
The priest says, 'What did he ask, Mary?'
She says, 'He said, 'Please Mary, put down that gun!'
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