BB FANS

Heard these words of wisdom in our church last Sunday:

An elderly lady had three sons, and each of them wanted to buy her a special Christmas present.

The first bought her a mansion.

The second wanted to buy her a car, but decided that due to her failing eyesight, providing her with a chauffeur-driver limousine would be a better idea.

The third some bought her a parrot which recited verses from the Bible.

She was delighted with the gifts, but said to the first son - 'Son, there was no need to buy me a mansion, at my age, and with my arthritis, I can't manage the stairs, so a room would have been enough.

To the second son she said 'Thanks for the chauffeur-driven car, but with my eyesight, I can't see much when I'm being driven around, and I get tired anyway, so there was no need to spend all that money'.

But she had nothing bad to say about the third son's gift. She was overjoyed with it, so she simply said to him: 'Thanks son, the turkey was absolutely delicious'

I used that as a children's address once GG - what a hoot.

I could tell you what my son said in church once in a stage whisper it was only cos he couldn't pronounce his words properly

When my little girl was two she once asked loudly, 'Is Jesus here yet?'

I thought it was quite sweet but lots of old ladies glared at her

She is very good in church now though

we had a sermon about christmas last year and to demonstrate something my (then three year old) son was asked to pull a cracker. he was really bad at pronouncing words and often used to produce the 'f' sound for anything. He said at the top of his voice afterwards. 'Mummy I pulled a f*cker in church'

When my brother was little he once embarrassed my mother when the bishop walked up the aisle and he asked loudly, ' why is that man wearing his thunderbirds hat?'

Brilliant!