BB FANS

Jackie claims she has never had plastic surgery.Sun

Caprice cries, not when she sees Brigittte's boobs It is John's opinion of her that brought her to tears.
Sun

Saturday 15 January
Bez wants a night on the tiles
Not A Happy Monday
There was no booze before bedtime in the House tonight, a situation that left Bez feeling seriously agitated - and considering a drastic solution.

As his housemates got into their pjs just before 1am, Bez confessed he was having trouble going to bed so early. "Friday night going to bed at this time?" he sighed, shaking his head in disbelief.

Lisa urged him to see it as a detox - but Bez told her he couldn't take it.

"I'm lyin' awake till half four every mornin'," he said, exasperated. "I went off me head last night - I'm not kidding," he said, adding, "I kid you not," just to make sure they knew he was really, seriously not kidding.

Lisa suggested herbal sleeping tablets might help.

But Bez reckoned more extreme action might be necessary... like scaling the walls.

"The worst thing is, I don't know any f***ing phone numbers if I do get over the wall - I can't remember one of them," he garbled.
Lisa in bed
"Tomorrow is another day!"

When Lisa told him he wouldn't get very far, Bez assured her that it didn't matter.

"I just want to go out for the f***ing night," he insisted.

Lisa decided to put a stop to all his nonsense. "First, you're gonna injure yourself," she began sternly, "Second, you're gonna get in a whole heap of trouble. And thirdly, you're gonna forfeit all your money," she finished. "What's the f***ing point? Go to bed," she instructed.

Bez was eventually persuaded, but continued to grumble.

"If I could go to bed steamin', I'd get me 'ead down," he moaned, "What I f***ing hate is them tellin' me how much I can f***ing drink."

Lisa had her mantra ready. "Come on. You'll get through this. Tomorrow is another day," she pep-talked.

That's not much use tonight though, is it?!
Ch4

Saturday 15 January

Jackie Mouths Off



After a reviving glass of Chardonnay, grande dame Jackie Stallone shrugged off her eviction and chatted to the press, where she spilt the beans on Brigitte, John, plastic surgery and more...

Are you going to keep in touch with Brigitte?

Yes. She's going to meet me in California. We got a lot of things ironed out.

How many of the Housemates did you get to know?

I know John. I'm so glad I left [because] John makes everyone miserable. He's just looking for a fight. He hates the world.

Any sexual undertones in the House?

No. I wouldn't, that's for sure.

The dizzy blonde, they'd have [to have]a million in the bank.

[Jeremy], nobody would sleep with him... it'd be a lousy trip. He's too selfish to share that even.

The little kid would be good. For somebody, someday. I'm sure he's practised.

Who's going to win?

Brigitte or the little boy. She's held her head up high. And the little boy, he's just starting out in life. He's sweet and naïve.

Would you consider having surgery to keep your looks?

Absolutely. I think I'm gonna have it soon

What would you have?

Everything. I'd have a facelift... especially looking in these mirrors. I don't want to leave town looking like this. My hair's all frizzed up.

What's going on with those lips?

These happen to be mine. I would not get my lips pumped up. I've never had to.
Ch4

Hit The Road Jack

The Housemates have had an extended bitching session about their departed Housemate Jackie, with Jeremy, Lisa and John leading the chorus.

"She's a vile individual," said Lisa.

"She was so vile," agreed John.

"She's a f***ing bitch," said Jeremy. With feeling.

"You're right," said Lisa, like she'd come across a new angle. "She's a f***ing bitch." Rarely have the Housemates been in such unison.

And while Lisa sang, "The witch is dead, the wicked witch is dead," Jeremy related one of his encounters with her.

"When she came in, I lost it. She told me, 'Go f*** yourself, you piece of s***. You're worth nothing.' I think she's a f***ing witch. A vile person."
Lisa sings
Lisa finds an appropriate song to sing

Even Jackie's favourite 'baby' Kenzie was pleased. "It's cool she's gone," he said.

Another thing the House was united on was how well Brigitte reacted to having her ex-mother-in-law arrive.

"If I had known I would never have come," she said.

"You're a star," John told her. "You behaved with dignity."

Jeremy thought she deserved a medal.

John, convinced he would have had his wish and been evicted if he had been up against any other individual, agreed.

"They should send in champagne. We have survived that creature."

And now they just need to survive each other.Ch4

Tea With The Queen


The housemates had a good chuckle last night over evictee Jackie's claim that she's to take tea with the Queen.

John shuddered at the thought. "Feel sorry for Her Majesty," he said.

"You know why she's going? Because they're so alike," said Brigitte, tongue firmly in cheek.

"Don't say that!" protested John, at which Kenzie had to clear up the confusion.

"SHE said that to ME, John! 'I'm going to see the Queen [because] we've got so much in common'," he explained.

John was disgusted. "The Queen meets some pretty grotty people," he started, "but if that thing turned up at Buckingham Palace..."

They then decided what Jackie was actually doing was the paid tour round the palace with the rest of the plebians.
Jackie
"Two lumps please, Liz"

"She'll get the tourist ticket and when she gets back to LA, she'll tell everyone she had tea with the Queen!" Brigitte assured them.

"...and it won't be as nice as her house, and the china was dirty, the rooms were ugly..." surmised Lisa to snorts of laughter.

"...and I told the Queen this, and I told the Queen that..." joined in John.

As the giggling subsided, they decided Brigitte should take over her room.

"We'll change the sheets... tomorrow, and we'll fumigate," stated Lisa.

"You'll need more than that - [the room] needs blowing up," said John grimly.

"Absolutely vile woman," murmured Lisa.

"F***ing hated her," pitched in Jeremy.

She's gone, but not forgotten...Ch4

Federico has his say about the CBB housemates:
Daily Record.

Bez to make a run for it?!


Femalefirst

"informed the pre-pubescent, single-digit-IQ, bed-wetting gangsta'"

Oh the irony

What a bunch they are, Jackie was great,

Not a happy camper
Dry Your Eyes


Lisa needed some time to herself this morning, as she was feeling a little weepy.

Deciding to skip leading the housemates in their daily yoga session, Lisa explained she felt more like exercising on her own.

As the others followed Caprice's aerobic workout, Lisa found her own spot to do her stretches. But as she lifted her head up it appeared she had been crying.

With the rest of the group distracted by the arrival of their shopping, Lisa made her way over to the bedroom rubbing her eyes.

Let's hope Lisa doesn't fold


A concerned Brigitte patted her on the back and asked if there was anything she could do to help. Lisa shook her head but thanked Brigitte.

She then took to folding away her clothes to calm herself down and wisely decided a jaunt in the jacuzzi would lift her spirits.

Cheer up, Lisa, at least Jackie's not around to wind you up anymore!
Ch4

Lisa
Lordy, she can be harsh!
Feature: Lovely Lisa


Lisa has been the first to admit that she is "bitchy by nature", something that became glaringly obvious with the arrival of Jackie.

Although she did make an attempt at civility, this soon spiralled into an impressive display of bitching.

Referring to the pensioner as a "venomous little witch," she was none too pleased with the new housemate. "First you give us John and now the bride of Frankenstein," she whined to Big Brother.

She soon excelled at running down Jackie's appearance. After Jackie insisted she was a natural beauty, Lisa snarled, "What? Were you born with eyeliner?"

When the group were busy guessing her age Lisa commented, "Oh God knows! How old is a fossil? Damn, she looks good."
Lisa
Ding dong: round one

Even after Jackie had made her exit she wasn't spared the wrath of Lisa. Celebrating with a rousing chorus of 'Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead' she promised, "I'll burn an effigy of her in the morning."

She also advised that in order to be completely rid of Jackie they would need to "clean and fumigate her room."

Hardly a charmer himself, John has met his match on many an occasion, with Lisa dismissing him as pathetic. "He can't dress, can't eat. He opened a can of sweetcorn with a knife," she sneered.

Ouch!Ch4