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Reality TV show Shattered proves to be a dismal re-run of Big Brother - without any kip
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First there was Big Brother, then Teen Big Brother, and now Shattered — Big Brother, but without the sleep. Given this list, it’s fairly clear that, on the horizon, we can look forward to One-Handed Big Brother, Dog Big Brother and *h N*! Big Brother, but where no one is allowed to use vowels.
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How should you treat someone the morning after a one-night stand? Is cheating in a game inexcusable? Are there any other benders as likeable as Brian? As an added bonus, I think it’s important that we have an influx of thick-skinned imbeciles to distract the paparazzi, leaving genuinely talented famous people a little more privacy to get on with their lives. If it takes a year of Jade Goody to let Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow have a lunch in peace, then so be it.
That’s a cultural deal I’m willing to strike. However, even I believe Shattered to be a reformat too far.
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On top of this, the contestants are the usual dreary bunch (media-studies students and body-builders) who have nothing to do but muck around, sleepily, all day. If someone had given them a couple of engaging tasks — driving a large oil-tanker around Alaska, say — then, maybe, Shattered would have found some impetus. But when seven sleepy people sit around, trying to be just wacky and likeable enough to go on to a presenting job, like Kate Lawler from Big Brother, the effect is rather like being coshed to death with Timmy Mallet’s inflatable Wacaday mallet.
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Put me to sleep, now
