BB FANS

A BRIT ON THE SIDE
Edited By Rupert Everett

HELP! I'm caught up in an intriguing love triangle, having fallen head over heels for both Jordan and David Walliams - and I don't know which way to turn.

David, he of Little Britain fame, is very clever and stimulates my mind, but I'm not sure if he's gay.

Jordan is also very clever and stimulates other parts of my body, but I'm not sure if she's gay either.

Mirror

BUST PALS
Eva Simpson & Caroline Hedley

RUPERT Everett and mega-boobed model Jordan look joined at the hip as they hook up for a bite.

When he came in last week to edit our column, Rupe drooled she is "beautiful, driven and an absolute inspiration" and the feeling appears to be mutual. We can reveal the 28-year-old mum-oftwo is planning a big-screen biopic of herself and wants him to direct.

Gay Rupert and Jordan went for a cosy lunch in London to discuss the project.

A source reveals: "Despite appearances they have loads in common. She thinks his book Red Carpets And Other Banana Skins is brilliant and wants to use his talents."

One tip Rupe: wide-angle lens! Mirror