BB FANS

HappyDaiz · **Joined:** 29 Jun 02, 16:52 **Posts:** 10718

Looking back I think I could have given it some wellie :-?

Re-living it in my mind there's alot of ''you're a bunch of f***king liars'' and ''no I'm F***ing NOT doing really f***ing well you B******'' and ''Paul you're a S*** B****** C***'' ::lol::

Damn that felt good

tastyfish

I am so glad I don't have to go through that. You can tell God was a bloke - I can see exactly what was going through his mind

Liisi

God's plan worked well untill after a weird twist of faith men started to attend the births of their children. It's been hell ever since ::lol::

I didn't swear at all when I was giving birth which might sound odd because I usually do slip out an occational f*ck, s*it and bloody hell when things aren't going my way. It was just that I didn't have time to swear; at the point someone might have sweared, I was screaming. I bet the mum in the next room that wasn't that far on her delivery yet got really scared about what's ahead :oops:

When my son was born the assisting midwife was really rude, she dropped my leg because she felt I was intentionally kicking her while pushing and when I was really badly in pain and screaming she said that I shouldn't scream so much. I would propably have killed her if I didn't have a baby half out. I mean, I had a baby half out. It hurts. A lot.

Mari A

I have had two great midwifes, they let me do all the decisions during the both of my deliverys, we discussed over things before, during and after deliverys and they gave me choises even when I was ready to start pushing. I have felt that midwifes has respected me and my deliveries and they were there to help me as they should.

Making voices (I didn't swear at all, why would I - it's a natural situation and I'm proud that we women can do it) helps through the situation - athletics uses voices to get more power in sports, you use voices in martial arts and some use voices when they meditate for example.

Also positions where you are and what do you need to do with your body to consentrate (to follow your instincts and let all that happen) to the situation are unique but natural. Liisi's assisting midwife didn't understand that or couldn't help Liisi with that - they are human. And sometimes in deliveries we women need men, especially when we want to birth naturally and when we can or we are allowed to do it - they are physically strong enough to help with positions that mother chooses through the delivery.

For me midwifes gave my newborns immediately and I think it's the most beautiful moment in my life when the child looks at you, when he/she is ready to breastfeed first time - I sing to both of my children to wellcome them. Both of my deliverys has been different as they always are and there's always a risk that something goes wrong. I'm supporter of natural birthing, but if something goes wrong I trust mine and childs life to hands of medical staff.

Deliverying a baby hurts, but it's easier (for me) to handle with pain when you know what's happening all the time in your body and when you can feel that all happening and you don't resist it happening. And you know all the time that pain stops immeadiately after baby has born.

Liisi

I thought I could handle the pain going in both of my deliverys, but at some point the pain got so bad I wasn't even concious at the peak of the contraction I had to ask for epidural. Well, actually my husband did because I couldn't speak anymore. I think a birth is natural wether you get drugs or not. It doesn't hurt the baby and makes the mum relax and that helps the delivery proceed. The fact that I didn't hurt like hell for a couple of hours doesn't make my deliverys any less natural. I just think the term is weird. What is the defination of natural? Is it the way they did it back in old days? Then everything from electricity to mobile phones and flying is unnatural. Times change so why can't we?

Mari A

Someone has said that if men could give a birth to a child they would have change things less painfull.

What I'm worried about are those hundreds of things that may go wrong during the delivery. Medication effects always on a child. Worst thing is too less oxygene - which can make huge brain damages even that pregnancy has gone fine. Too skinny mothers with too low haemoglobin level can effect on a child during the pregnancy with too less oxygene.

And what I ment with following your instinct and knowing and feeling in your body whats happening in every moment through the delivery and have all that knowledge over the situation helps ME to handle pain better - I know why it hurts and I know whats going to happen and I know what I can do (and if I don't remember what to do, midwifes job is to remind me for that). For me its ok to give birth to a child naturally (we call it LUOMU-SYNNYTYS over here and midwifes and doctors uses that term as well) but I'll make always sure before the delivery that medical help is near if it's needed any time - so I wouldn't have my deliverys at home like my grandmother has done and I wouldn't risk anything. And I ment also that every delivery are different and every mother has different experiences over their deliverys. And every newborn are miracles of life and every mother should be proud of their capabilities to deliver a new life, no matter the way it happens.

Liisi

Let's not generalize, not every painmedication given during birth affects the child. For instance nitrous oxide has no affect what so ever, nor has epidural. Every doctor I talked to about these forms of painmedication said that it helps the child get more oxygen in case the mother is so much in pain she can't relax. Natural childbirth -believers say they would loose touch of their delivery, that they'd go numb if they had for instance an epidural for the pain, but after having two of them I say that's a load of crap. I felt every single contraction despite the epidural and it did still hurt a lot. I never felt in control of the situation after it started really hurting untill I got the epidural. I still did all the work, my daughter's delivery lasted for 21 hours and my son's 8. The epidural just helped me stay concious and handle the situation. But as said, everyone does it their way, I just wonder why people feel the need to critisize other people's way of doing it as long as it's safe for everyone. And I'm not talking about you here, Mari, I've heard some really ugly comments from a few "natural"mums.

Mari A

Yep - they might get very nasty with their comments, especially in Helsinki, where the reality is sometimes far from truth. I can't understand why mothers can't support each other to choose their own unique best ways to go through their deliverys.

In Finland they can give epidural that you can still walk with it and they don't pump mothers full with drugs. And you are very true with that what you wrote: "If mother is so much in pain that she can't relax, painmadication helps the child to get more oxygen".

The lasting of the deliverys are also unique, all depends on are mother and child fine. I think it's great to hear and discuss with other mothers what kind of experience they have had and what kind of midwifes they have had - over here it's well known that doctors would be called to be there if it's necessary but most of the time there are only one or two midwifes to help mother to give a birth to a child. I can't remember any loger how long my deliverys lasted if I don't check the correct time from my papers. All I can remember that my first delivery were really calmfull and peacefull (I was in hospital about 8-9 hours before my son was born) and my second child was in a hurry (I was in a hospital about 1-2 hours - in pool - before she was born) but there were natural reasons for both of deliverys that they went the way they went. And all the time there were awareness that something could go wrong and awareness that if I do need medication they will give it to me.

And the second discussion after the child has born is the breastfeeding - it's also unique, but every mother needs positive support with that. I believe that naturality is giving support to each other, not blaming anybody.

BB FANS

Woman gives birth as Art

Who is online