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| It's not April 1st already is it? http://www.bbfans.co.uk/viewtopic.php?f=52&t=24530 |
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| Author: | alanlapin [ 31 Jan 06, 21:51 ] |
| Post subject: | It's not April 1st already is it? |
I am referring to the story of the clumsy berk who managed to trip into three 300 year-old Chinese Qing dynasty vases at a museum in Cambridge. Now this seems, to me, like an obnoxious prank for one of those tedious hidden camera shows. It just doesn't ring true for many reasons: 1. The vases weren't locked in a secure, alarmed display case. Highly suspicious for 'priceless' artefacts. For theft prevention and accidental damage this surely would be the necessary precaution. 2. Bad enough that these vases were on open air display where they could be touched or stolen, they were actually placed AT THE BOTTOM OF STAIRS on a window sill!!! 3. The berk who tripped had shades on. In a museum? 4. The camera captured his fall, and the pictures have been released to the press. Again, suspicious. 5. He pointed at his loose shoelace and said "There's the culprit!" A most odd reaction. 6. The museum didn't charge him. And the Police didn't question him. Now if it was me, whether the vases are real or fake, I would: 1. Fire the head of security and the directors/curators at the museum. 2. Kick the vase breaker up the ass all the way around the streets of Cambridge. 3. Repeatedly punch the producers of whatever crappy TV show this idiotic stunt was filmed for. |
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| Author: | Chocolate Truffle [ 31 Jan 06, 21:59 ] |
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The insurance investigators are going to have a BALL tearing that claim to bits!
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| Author: | alanlapin [ 31 Jan 06, 22:13 ] |
| Post subject: | |
I never thought of that!
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| Author: | alanlapin [ 31 Jan 06, 22:16 ] |
| Post subject: | |
Shoelace costs museum dear as vases are shattered Oops! |
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| Author: | BBoop [ 31 Jan 06, 22:47 ] |
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Cambridge is full of nutters
Having taken legions of kids round the museum in question to look at Egyptian artefacts I recall not being allowed to so much as fart in the direction of anything before someone from the museum was breathing fire down my neck. Honestly after baked beans for tea the night before it was a nightmare
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| Author: | alanlapin [ 31 Jan 06, 23:02 ] |
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So is going around public buildings and farting at the features, fixtures and fittings your hobby then? Even going so far as to fuel up on baked beans the night before a visit?
Now I remember your old BB username! 'Happy Crappy' wasn't it?
It's all coming out now!
I just hope you brought a mop!
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| Author: | BBoop [ 31 Jan 06, 23:14 ] |
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well if you are to be believed I should be called Happy Follow Through However I am pleased to say that wasn't and isn't the case. I was just trying to emphasis the fact that the museum people were all over us like a rash. I think they thought we were going to run off with some dull piece of sh*t that the poor school kids were subjected to look at and study. I might go in with a large umberella next time and spin round really fast. Might end up somewhere interesting
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| Author: | alanlapin [ 31 Jan 06, 23:25 ] |
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HC wrote: I might go in with a large umberella next time and spin round really fast. Might end up somewhere interesting
![]() With this talk of umbrellas and spinning around, I'm not sure if you are Mary Poppins by day, Wonder Woman by night!
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| Author: | ellie [ 31 Jan 06, 23:28 ] |
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That just about sounds like the perfect woman Alan so it must be HC. |
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| Author: | alanlapin [ 31 Jan 06, 23:36 ] |
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True Ellie. However, I'm not keen on the the Lassoo that makes men have to tell the truth!
Come to think of it, the umbrella that looks like Maggot has to go too!
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| Author: | BBoop [ 31 Jan 06, 23:47 ] |
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well I'm just relived there is no mention of Pete Burns when I said about spinning round. I don't think I could cope. |
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| Author: | ellie [ 01 Feb 06, 0:02 ] |
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aaargh now you have ruined all the images of Kylie in her gold hot pants for me HC. |
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| Author: | alanlapin [ 01 Feb 06, 0:07 ] |
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Do you mind!? My 'outraged from Tunbridge Wells' thread about ruined ancient Chinese artefacts is no place to moan about some short-(but cute)-arsed Antipodean talent-free caterwauler. |
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| Author: | BBoop [ 01 Feb 06, 0:11 ] |
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alanlapin wrote: Do you mind!?
My 'outraged from Tunbridge Wells' thread about ruined ancient Chinese artefacts is no place to moan about some short-(but cute)-arsed Antipodean talent-free caterwauler. I know but all roads lead to moaning about Pete. Do you really think he's cute?
*backs away slowly* |
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| Author: | alanlapin [ 01 Feb 06, 0:14 ] |
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Cheeky monkey!!!
You know I meant Kylie! And I don't think she's particularly cute. She's as much of an arse as her famed posterior. Don't like her personality or her hits. |
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