Thu, Aug 25, 2005
megastar
Wyndham King
Dansak Rik keeps his big end up for Blighty
Hey you! Yes you, fatso, in the comfy slacks. Put your hands in the air and move away from the cookie jar.
Fat yanks are piling on the pounds like a starved Michelle McManus on the loose in a McDonald's Drive-Thru, according to the Times.
Aren't Americans porky enough already? You'd have thought so, judging by some of the sun-blotting mega-arses you see waddling round in sweatpants among the tourist fraternity when they wheeze their way to this side of the pond.
But scary new findings reveal that our burger-addled US cousins are lashing on the uber-guts like there's no tomorrow.
"The ever-expanding state of the union" has seen all-round portliness increase in all but one of the States' 50, er, states.
Now "junk-food fan" and ex-Prez Bill Clinton has got involved in the huge problems of his humungous countrymen, expressing his worries - especially in the wake of his own past health problems - about the number of overweight kids wobbling around the American "burger belt".
The Times says, however, that the powerful junk-food industry is fighting back against attempts to improve America's eating habits.
Rik Waller is 107 stone.