September 9, 2006
TVScoop
Into the second half of the six-week audition stage and tonight the buses (and the private jet) flitted between Leeds, London and Manchester.
Only they needn't have bothered with Leeds, because for the first time in X-Factor history NO contestants went through for the entire first day.
There must be something in the water in Leeds (and it isn't fluoride).
Apart from setting the record for the lowest number of contestants progressing to boot camp, tonight's show was probably the least memorable on record. This week's two mandatory sob stories - 56-year-old Janet who broke her spine and did an excrutiatingly embarrassing impersonation of Kylie Minogue singing "Can't Get You Out Of My Head", and Robert-with-the-pregnant-girlfriend who recently lost a sister and father to cancer and choked when talking of how he wanted to be successful for his unborn child - naturally got through unscathed (although why Janet was allowed through when only a few minutes later Sharon was trying to explain to another contestant that "the standard is so high this year" is beyond me).
By my count that's eight heartrending stories through to boot camp already. Last year we pretty much only had Andy-the-honest-binman, so I predict only one of these will make it to the final. We wouldn't want to spread the angst around too many containers.
"Avenue", totally indistinguishable from every five-piece boy band you've ever seen and heard, seemed to impress Louis and Sharon, although SImon quite rightly commented "I don't get it." But remember Simon - it's LOUIS who's the expert on boy bands.
Tonight's manufactured bust-up featured last year's group category near misses Eskimo Blonde (with new member), their ex-lead singer Hari, and a lonely-looking Sharon - abandoned by "the boys" to give the bad news to Eskimo Blonde herself. Hari sailed through (the result was never in doubt: Simon told her last year that the other two had pulled her down) and watched as Sharon was left with the casting vote on Eskimo Blonde. Despite their begging, she stuck to her guns and delivered a resounding no, even though she found it necessary to dangle a carrot for them by saying "my heart wants me to say yes" which of course only made them beg harder. "Great" television; total lack of humanity. These are people's dreams you're shattering Sharon - no need to ham it up even more.
She tried to berate Simon and Louis for leaving her on her own, but like a pair of naughty schoolboys they could only sit and giggle into their cuppas. Sharon took the only option left and walked out. Lucky that by then it was already the end of the show, really.
