BB FANS

The State of Susie
Tuesday 13 June
Day 27, 06:30

Having already ruffled a few feathers, newcomer Susie is set to rile the group up even more as she takes control of the House.

Little do the housemates know that when they wake up, it will be in the State of Susie!

As part of their next task, for the next 48 hours they will be citizens in a land governed by the whims of the golden one - and populated by statues and banners of her. Failure to conform will constitute a rule break. Notch up three and they'll fail the task.

So what are the new laws?

Housemates often like a singsong to keep up morale. But crooners beware! Citizens can only sing Susie's favourite three tracks -- 'Living on a Prayer' by Bon Jovi, 'You're Just Too Good To Be True' by Andy Williams, and 'I Like The Way You Move' by The Bodyrockers.

Fancy a bite in the State of Susie? We hope the housemates aren't fussy as only the finest cuisine preferred by the model can be eaten - lobster, poached salmon, and strawberries - and nothing else! The absence of Glyn's infamous toast concoctions will at least provide some relief.

From her presidential podium in the garden, Susie will oversee various tasks to celebrate her leadership. These include designing flags and parades, shooting a tourist video and composing a national anthem.

The reward for passing the task is a luxury shopping budget for the next week. Failure will mean housemates have to endure basic rations.

Will there be revolution?! Stay tuned to find out if the housemates make loyal citizens...

ch4

Grace s fa\ce is like thunder already and she hasnt even finished the announcement.

so obvious BB

now the next 2 days all we'll have is footage of Grace & Nikki slating Suzie and Richard & Aisleyene defending her

Groundhog Day redux

Wait til she sees the bedlinen!!!

ROFL!!!It's so tacky!

How hard is it not sing ... well onviouslt too hard as they have done ot three times now ..

Alas this is a failed task and one that was seeminglu so easy .. I would be ashamed of my self if I was one of those that had sung.. Nikki Richard Pete Ash and now Glyn

Citizen Pain
Tuesday 13 June
Day 27, 10:10

Resplendent in white and gold military uniform, with her epaulettes gently blowing in the breeze, the newly appointed dictator mounted her rostrum this morning for her first official address.

While the rest of the housemates gathered reluctantly before their new leader and enjoyed their last minutes of freedom, Susie read out the task.

"My reign begins today," she said, adjusting her wonky peaked cap. "You are my obedient people. You must obey my commands."

As she ran through the rules, the housemates' faces were a mix of grins and frowns. Except Nikki's. She was too busy cramming down cornflakes.

"You must give me unconditional loyalty and obedience," continued Susie. "I'm in a state. And so are you."

"F***** sake," moaned Grace, stomping into the House, picking up a cushion and chucking it at Susie's face - the one plastered over the bathroom door.

"This is just to p*** us off," grumbled Nikki to Grace.

You know what girls, you might be right.

Ch4

Task: Poetry Recital
Tuesday 13 June
Day 27, 14:04

The was a young woman named Susie...
...who Big Brother decreed should be choosy

She was made dictator

Now the other housemates hate her

And that's without being boozy

Now her citizens have to write rhymes

For this afternoon's task, which is timed

They have just 30 minutes

To get 10 lines in it

Or else they'll have committed a crime

Or a fail.

(See what we did there?)

Ch4

Rhyme Scene Investigation

With rhymes that would make Wordsworth weep, the housemates delivered their task poems to Susie with varying degrees of zeal.

Susie was already settling into her role of dictator, bossing the housemates around as they lined up in front of her to recite their verses. "Put your hands on chests. I like being saluted," she demanded, wryly.

Richard was first up with a fawning ditty that described Susie as "diamonds and pearls".

Pete's effort included the keenly observed couplet: "Susie is a posh bird, she doesn't like dog turd." To which Susie gushed: "You're very talented."

Lea's swiftly-read poem identified their dictator as 'classy, witty' before concluding it with a hardcore swear word, which caught everyone by surprise. "You're very naughty," scolded Susie.

Glyn's syrupy sonnet pushed the rules of metre to the limits, crowbarring a rhyme out of 'talkative' and 'positive'.

"I can feel myself filling up," said dewy-eyed Susie

"She loves her tea. Typical, she's 43," read Imogen. While Grace's ode questioned why she "had a problem with Grace".

At the end of the task, Glyn was named poet laureate. "He deserves it. It was a love poem. And it was lovely," grinned Susie, clearly moved.

Wonder if he'll be off wandering lonely as a cloud now?

Ch4

Naughty but Nice
Tuesday 13 June
Day 27, 18:39

Nikki's not too good at this State of Susie task lark. She's breaking rules left, right and centre.

Hanging out in the bedroom, Nikki encouraged Lea to eat some naughty food and she sang a song that's not on Susie's favourite list. Hmm.

During the State of Susie task, the housemates are only allowed to eat Susie's favourite foods. These are lobster, poached salmon and strawberries - and definitely, certainly, not chocolate.

"Do you want some chocolate?" Nikki sneakily whispered to Lea. "I've got two pieces, look."

Lea didn't need much persuading, as she and Nikki soon munched on some chocolate. That was rule break number one right there.

Then, during a casual chat, Aisleyne said she wanted to go somewhere "riding her punani".

No sooner had those words left her mouth than Nikki was happily singing 'Ride the Punani'. Funnily enough, that song wasn't on Susie's favourite list and was rule break number two for Nikki.

C'mon Nikki, you could at least try!

CH 4

Spot on

BBLB said they had failed the task.

Must have been Grace's fault for bitching!!

Think they had failed it quite early on today.Both Nikki and Richard were singing songs that hadn't been sanctioned by Suzi.Could be Grace pulling down the Suzi poster contributed too.She had every reason to want to fail the task if she thinks shes going Friday.

Wednesday 14 June
Day 28, 09:23 CH4

The State of Susie is only two days old... and the natives are already getting restless.

The housemates were made to pledge allegiance to their leader not once, not twice, but three times before they'd even put the kettle on this morning.

A fanfare awoke them and they dutifully made their way to salute Susie's statue, before crawling straight back under their duvets en masse. But within minutes they were dragged out of bed again... and my how grumpy they looked. When the trumpets blared out a third time, the State was on the brink of revolt.

Pete seemed to be getting especially disillusioned. The first time he pledged allegiance normally, the second time he did it in a silly voice and by the third time he had resorted to strange noises instead of words. Even Susie seemed fed up at her third fanfare; cursing as the bugle called her back for more insincere adulation.

Realising Big Brother wasn't going to let them sleep, the group trudged into the kitchen. But with more of Susie's favourite foods on the menu, breakfast didn't seem appetising.

"I can't bare to eat any more bread," complained Nikki.

How long before we have a revolution on our hands?