BB FANS

Do they have them by the tills in your asda?? Its like the way they put sweets there so kids pester their parents for them now theyre doing it with alcohol - and Im standing at the checkout going "Pllllllleeeeeeaaaasssse can I have one?" and paul's smacking my wrist saying "NO!!! Put it down "

Huh! Keep missing everybody...... I'll try again later.

It's Ok Everyone ...You can come out now , He's gone

*pulls stool away from the bar and plonks myself down* Over here please barmaid........

*comes out of snug*

Is it too early for a drink? Have you seen that Quarell has done an avatar ode to Obo? Have a look quick before he changes it, the one of him with a pipe only lasted 2 days!

His is a lowly budgie!!

Mines Polo the Macaw!!!

Yep! No contest

*bangs glass down on bar*... Another over here please.......

You getting drunk at THIS time of day, Lyns?
Well, if you can't beat 'em.......

*bangs glass*..AND ME

*suddenly remembers I have been playing 'no clothes Twister' and runs back into the snug *

Realises no buggers serving round here - whips behind bar grabs a dirty glass and a rag - proceeds to polish glass with rag while holding it up to light - ignores the cries for more drinks

Barmaids are a bit rough in here tonight

...never mind - here comes Pamela Anderson, as
relief staff........oh yes....what relief.

*Finally escapes from the toilets, looking harassed*


It's like a maze in there, I kept trying to leave and finding myself back in the end trap. There must be a tear in the fabric of reality, or maybe I just fell asleep on the bog, I dunno.

Bartender - pint of stella please, and whatever everyone else wants.


*waves an arm magnam... magnimano... magnanimamni ... generously*

have you seen her without her slap on?

Now if we want a decent barmaid how about Sarah Whatmore?